Philly is p cute

After the initial shock of living with vermin and leaky walls in a place with no sunlight, I’m starting to see Philly for all of its charms. The narrow streets feel cozy instead of cramped, and I have come to peace with randos seeing me go in and out of my house. And I haven’t felt a mouse scurry by my toes in a month or two, so that is a real triumph (knock on wood).

A guy who was rude to Noah our first few weeks here approached him on the street and apologized. And the other grumpy neighbor who told us to go back to where we came from where dogs pee everywhere on the sidewalks (????) - well I’ve made peace with the fact that he’s just rude.

This city is also so much more dog friendly than I could have ever hoped for. I kept seeing dogs in places where I never would have imagined taking Rosie before, so I tried it myself too. And instead of giving us dirty looks, employees shower Ro with compliments and give her a ton of love, and sometimes even throw her a treat. Who needs Chicago!

Even though I’m no longer afraid to cook in my house and leave bits of food behind for our underground neighbors, I just haven’t had time or mental energy to try new recipes. We’ve either been out of town or had company visiting us in town. And the weeks in between, I spend my precious days off as a potato, trying to recover mentally from feeling like there is too much to do, too little time.

And we’re trying to diet LOL. It was going okay for a week - okay in terms of staying on track, not so okay in terms of mental health. I couldn’t stop thinking about food and what I shouldn’t eat and shouldn’t be wanting to eat. It is kind of unsustainable and actually made me hungrier and want to eat more.

But our eating habits have grown a bit too unhealthy in an effort to cope with the last 18 months and it’s been a pretty big wake up call for us both. Now it’s just about finding a balance and a routine that feels doable in the mid-long term. Because if one of us falls off the wagon, there is no hope for the other.

Since I am physically incapable of eating the same foods everyday, I have to document every recipe and calculate calories per portions for every meal I cook. It takes a little bit of time and impedes workflow in the kitchen, but ya know what, it’s a small price to pay to try to feel like a diet is not ruining my life.

Dieting is also exponentially harder when Noah is also home at night because all we want to do is go out and enjoy a nice meal. If just one of us falls of the wagon, we always drag the other with us. So we’ve been failing a lot. Also bending the rules for social situations, so often that the days we are actually on the diet have become the exception rather than the norm.

But it’s important for me that I don’t kick myself for wanting to enjoy my favorite activity and still want to generally eat healthier and better. Any progress is better than the past 18 months. So one step at a time.

I do have a couple of recipes I want to post for my own reference, one that I have been making and mentioning on my blog for 8 years now, so I’m excited for that. We’ll just... portion control that one…

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